(Excuse me while I simp)
If you stopped reading. I don't blame you. I've become lazy...And caught up.
However, if you still are, I appreciate it.
This blog was intended for personal use, and that's how it shall continue. Views do not constitute my will to express.
I can quite honestly say that I may have lost all or almost all sense of me.
Becoming caught up within a lifestyle that i'd never imagine.
Physically, this isn't TOO far from what I usually do.
Emotionally, it's a jump.
Which raises the question...Do I want peace?
I can't help but be a control freak now. But can you blame me? I'm not forcing anyone into doing anything.
I know, I know...compromise is key.
But is it selfish for me to want control over what's involved within my own life?
As far as i know, i didn't ask to be born. Was that not selfish of whatever gave birth to me?
And now, me being within existence to fend for myself...Is seen at as selfish.
Consider the fact that maybe I don't want to be ______ but yet, I do...with less predictability.
What's life with no chances. Happiness could be right around the corner...And knowing me, i'd stay right where I was.
Predictability can be a hindrance, but also provides stability. So which would I rather live by...
On top of being held within that, the slightest beam of anything different tends to draw my attention.
The lifestyle of which others brag about so much. I underestimated it. It's a lot easier to judge when you're not in the position.
This is the ________ of which gave birth to what I am.
Downtime is definitely needed.
My current situation. Happy...__. Content...Maybe. Insecure...A ______.
I did get what I asked for...right?
I can't help but say, that I am, all that is.
I'm not even sure of what's going on right now. Everything seems to be going by in a blur.
It's unstable. And I'm honestly tired of everything.
Wouldn't mind being called stupid right now. As would anyone in my position.
Either I'm not being taken seriously, or people just don't care.
Which brings to the final conclusion...Of which I'm sure another asks their self every day.
Do i sit and await to be ____ to...again (in hopes of changing my beliefs on "People don't change" because i'd really like to believe that people do. I guess this could be an experiment).
Or pack my ____ and get back to "the 'ol grind"
Whatever happens next, time will only tell.
Wasting time = Being Cursed.
Anyway, i've got some reading to do...Some stuff to catch up on.
And apparently a bank account to open.